Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
1.  Once you have their money, never give it back
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
2.  You can't cheat an honest customer, but it never hurts to try
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
3.  Never spend more for an acquisition than you have to
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
4.  Sex and profit are the two things that never last long enough
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
5.  If you can't break a contract, bend it
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
6.  Never let family stand in the way of opportunity
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
7.  Always keep you ears open
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
8.  Keep count of your change
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
9.  Instinct plus opportunity equals profit
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
10.  A dead customer can't buy as much as a live one
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
11.  Latinum isn't the only thing that shines
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
12.  Anything worth selling is worth selling twice
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
13.  Anything worth doing is worth doing for money
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
14.  Anything stolen is pure profit
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
15.  Acting stupid is often smart
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
16.  A deal is a deal ... until a better one comes along
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
17.  A bargain usually isn't
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
18.  A Ferengi without profit is no Ferengi at all
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
19.  Don't lie too soon after a promotion
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
20.  When the customer is sweating, turn up the heat
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
21.  Never place friend ship before profit
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
22.  wise men can hear profit in the wind
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
23.  Never take the last coin, but be sure to get the rest
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
24.  Never ask when you can take
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
25.  Fear makes a good business partner
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
26.  The vast majority of the rich in this galaxy did not inherit their wealth;
they stole it
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
27.  The most beautiful thing about a tree is what you do with it after you cut
it down
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
28.  Morality is always defined by those in power
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
29.  When someone says "It's not the money," they're lying
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
30.  Talk is cheap; synthehol costs money
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
31.  Never make fun of a Ferengi's mother
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
32.  Be careful what you sell. It may do exactly what the customer expects
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
33.  It never hurts to suck up to the boss
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
34. War is good for business
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
35.  Peace is good for business
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
36.  Too many Ferengi can't laugh at themselves anymore
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
37.  You can always buy back a lost reputation
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
38.  Free advertising is cheap
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
39.  Praise is cheap. Heap it generously on all customers
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
40.  If you see profit on a journey, take it
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
41.  Money talks, but having a lots of it gets more attention
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
42.  Only negotiate when you are certain to profit
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
43.  Caressing an ear is often more forceful than pointing a weapon
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
44.  Never argue with a loaded phaser
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
45.  profit has limits. Loss has none
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
46.  Labor camps are full of people who trusted the wrong person
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
47.  Never trust a man wearing a better suit than you own
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
48.  The bigger the smile, the sharper the knife
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
49.  Old age and greed will always overcome youth and talent
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
50.  Never bluff a Klingon
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
51.  Never admit a mistake if there's someone else to blame
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
52.  Only Bugsy could have built Las Vegas
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
53.  Sell first; ask questions later
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
54.  Never buy anything you can't sell
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
55.  Always sell at the highest possible profit
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
56.  Pursue profit; women come later
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
57.  Good customers are almost as rare as Latinum - treasure them
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
58.  Friendship is seldom cheap
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
59.  Fee advice is never cheap
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
60.  Never use Latinum where your words will do
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
61.  Never buy what can be stolen
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
62.  The riskier the road, the greater the profit
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
63.  power without profit is like a ship without an engine
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
64.  Don't talk shop; talk shopping
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
65.  Don't talk ship; talk shipping
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
66.  Anyone serving in a fleet who is crazy can be relieved, if they ask for it
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
67.  Enough is never enough
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
68.  Compassion is no substitute for a profit
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
69.  You could afford your ship without your government - if it weren't for
your government
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
70.  Get the money first, then let the buyers worry about collecting the
merchandise
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
71.  Gamble and trade have two things in common: risk and Latinum
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
72.  Never let the competition know, what you're thinking
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
73.  Never trust advice from a dying Ferengi; listen but don't trust
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
74.  A Ferengi without profit is no Ferengi at all
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
75.  Home is where the heart is, but the stars are made of Latinum
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
76.  Every once in a while, declare peace. It confuses the hell out of your
enemies
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
77.  Go where no Ferengi has gone before; where there is no reputation there is
profit
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
78.  There is a customer born every minute
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
79.  Beware of the Vulcan greed for knowledge
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
80.  If it works, sell it. If it works well, sell it for more. If it doesn't
work, quadruple the price and sell it as an antique
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
81.  There's nothing more dangerous than an honest businessman
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
82.  A smart customer is not a good customer
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
83.  Revenge is profitless
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
84.  She can touch your ears but never your Latinum
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
85.  Death takes no bribes
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
86.  A wife is a luxury,  a smart accountant a necessity
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
87.  Trust is the biggest liability of all
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
88.  When the boss comes to dinner, it never hurts to have the wife wear
something
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
89.  Latinum lasts longer than lust
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
90.  Mine is better than ours
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
91.  He who drinks fast pays slow
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
92.  Never confuse wisdom with luck
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
93.  He's a fool who makes his doctor his heir
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
94.  Beware of small expenses: a small leak will kill a ship
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
95.  Important, more impotant, Latinum
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
96.  Faith moves mountains - of inventory
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
97.  If you would keep a secret from an enemy, don't tell it to a friend
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
98.  Profit is the better part of valor
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
99.  Never trust a wise man
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
100.  Everything that has no owner, needs one
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
101.  Never do something you can make someone do for you
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
102.  Nature decays, but Latinum lasts forever
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
103.  Sleep can interfere with opportunity
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
104.  Money is never made. It is merely won or lost
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
105.  Wise men don't lie, they just bend the truth
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
106.  There is no honor in poverty
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
107.  Win or lose, there's always Huyperian Beetle Snuff
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
108.  A woman wearing clothes is like a man without profit
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
109.  Dignity and an empty sack is worth the sack
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
110.  Only a fool passes up a business opportunity
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
111.  Treat people in your debt like family ... exploit them
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
112.  Never sleep with the boss's wife unless you pay him first
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
113.  Never sleep with the boss's sister
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
114.  Small print lead to large risk
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
115.  Greed is eternal
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
116.  There's always a way out
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
117.  If the profit seems too good to be true, it usually is
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
118.  Never cheat a honest man offering a decent price
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
119.  Buy, sell, or get out of the way
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
120.  Even a blind man can recognize the glow of Latinum
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
121.  Everything is for sale, even friendship
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
122.  As the customers go, so goes the wise profiteer
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
123.  A friend is only a friend until you sell him something. Then he is a
customer
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
124.  Friendship is temporary, profit is forever
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
125.  A lie isn't a lie until someone else knows the truth
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
126.  A lie isn't a lie, it's just the truth seen from a different point of
view
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
127.  Gratitude can bring on generosity
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
128.  Ferengi are not responsible for the stupidity of other races
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
129.  Never trust your customers
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
130.  Never trust a beneficiary
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
131.  If it gets you profit, sell your own mother
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
132.  The flimsier the produce, the higher the price
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
133.  Never judge a customer by the size of his wallet ... sometimes good
things come in small packages
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
134.  There's always a catch
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
135.  The only value of a collectible is what you can get somebody else to pay
for it
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
136.  The sharp knife cuts quickly. Act without delay!
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
137.  Necessity is the mother of invention. Profit is the father
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
138.  Law makes everyone equal, but justice goes to the highest bidder
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
139.  Wives serve; brother inherit
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
140.  The answer to quick and easy profit is: buy for less, sell for more
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
141.  Competition and fair play are mutually exclusive. Fait play and financial
loss go hand-in-hand
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
142.  A Ferengi waits to bid until his opponents have exhausted themselves
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
143.  The family of Fools is ancient
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
144.  There's nothing wrong with charity ... as long as it winds up in your
pocket
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
145.  Always ask for the costs first
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
146.  If possible sell neither the sizzle nor the steak, but the Elphasian
wheat germ
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
147.  New customers are like razor toothed gree worms. They can be succulent,
but sometimes they bite back
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
148.  Opportunity waits for no one
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
149.  Females and finances don't mix
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
150.  Make your shop easy to find
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
151.  Sometimes, what you get free costs entirely too much
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
152.  Ask not what your profits can do for you; ask what you can do for your
profits
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
153.  You can't free a fish from water
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
154.  The difference between manure and Latinum is commerece
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
155.  What's mine is mine, and what's yours is mine too
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
156.  Even in the worst of times someone turns a profit
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
157.  You are surrounded by opportunities; you just have to know where to look
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
158.  Don't pay until you have the goods
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
159.  The customer is always right ... until you have their cash
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
160.  Respect is good, Latinum is better
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
161.  Never kill a customer, unless you make more profit out of his death than
out of his life
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
162.  His money is only your's when he can't get it back
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
163.  A thirsty customer is good for profit, a drunk one isn't
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
164.  Never spend your own money when you can spend someone else's
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
165.  Never allow one's culture's law to get in the way of a universal goal:
profit
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
166.  Never give away for free what can be sold
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
167.  If a deal is fairly and lawfully made, then seeking revenge especially
unprofitable revenge, is illegal
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
168.  Beware of relatives bearing gifts
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
169.  If you're going to have to endure, make yourself comfortable
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
170.  Never gamble with an empath
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
171.  Time is Latinum. The early Ferengi get the Latinum
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
172.  If you can sell it, don't hsitate to steal it
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
173.  A piece of Latinum in the hand is worth two in a customer's pocket
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
174.  Share and perish
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
175.  When everything fails - run
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
176.  Ferengi's don't give promotional gifts!
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
177.  Know your enemies ... but do business with them always
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
178.  The world is a stage - don't forget to demand admission
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
179.  Whenever you think that things can't get worse, the FCA will be knocking
on you door
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
180.  Never offer a confession when a bribe will do
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
181.  Even dishonesty can't tarnish the glow of Latinum
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
182.  Whenever you're being asked if you are god, the right answer is YES
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
183.  Genius without opportunity is like Latinum in the mine
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
184.  There are three things you must not talk to aliens: sex, religion and
taxes
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
185.  If you want to ruin yourself there are three known ways: Gambling is the
fastest, women are the sweetest, and banks are the most reliable way
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
186.  There are two things that will catch up with you for sure: death and
taxes
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
187.  If your dancing partner wants to lead at all costs, let her have her own
way and ask another one to dance
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
188.  Never bet on a race you haven't fixed
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
189.  Borrow on a handshake; lend in writing
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
190.  Drive your business or it will drive you
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
191.  Let other keep their reputation. You keep their money
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
192.  If the flushing isn't strong enough, use your brain and try the brush
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
193.  Klingon women don't dance tango
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
194.  It's always good business to know about new customers before they walk in
your door
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
195.  Wounds heal, but debt is forever
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
196.  Only give money to people you know you can steal from
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
197.  Never trust your customers, especially if they are your relatives
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
198.  Employees are the rungs on your ladder to success - don't hesitate to
step on them
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
199.  The secret of one person is another person's opportunity
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
200.  A madman with Latinum means profit without return
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
201.  The justification for profit is profit
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
202.  a)  A friend in need is a customer in the making
      b)  A friend in need means three times the profit
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
203.  A Ferengi in need, will never do anything for free
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
204.  When the Grand Nagus arrives to offer you a business opportunity, it's
time to leave town until he's gone
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
205.  When the customer dies, the money stops a-comin'
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
206.  Fighting with Klingons is like gambling with Cardassians - it's good to
have a friend around when you lose
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
207.  Never trust a hardworking employee
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
208.  Give someone a fish, you feed him for one day.  Teach him how to fish,
and you lose a steady customer
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
209.  Tell them what they want to hear
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
210.  A wife, who is able to clean, saves the cleaning lady
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
211.  In business deals, a disruptor can be almost as important as a calculator
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
212.  If they accept your first offer, you either asked too little or offered
too much
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
213.  Stay neutral in conflicts so that you can sell supplies to both sides
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
214.  Never begin a business transaction on an empty stomach
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
215.  Instinct without opportunity is useless
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
216.  Never take hospitality from someone worse off than yourself
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
217.  Only pay for it, if you are confronted with loaded phaser
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
218.  Always know what you're buying
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
219.  A friend is not a friend if he asks for a discount
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
220.  Profit is like a bed of roses - a few thorns are inevitable
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
221.  Beware of any man who thinks with his lobes
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
222.  Knowledge is Latinum
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
223.  Rich men don't come to buy; they come to take
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
224.  Never throw anything away: It may be worht a lot of Latinum some Stardate
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
225.  Pride comes before a loss
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
226.  Don't take your family for granted, only their Latinum
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
227.  Loyalty can be bought ... and sold
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
228.  All things come to those who wait, even Latinum
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
229.  Beware the man who doesn't make time for oo-mox
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
230.  Manipulation may be a Ferengi's greatest tool, and liability
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
231.  If you steal it, make sure it has a warranty
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
232.  Life's no fair (How else would you turn a profit?)
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
233.  Every dark cloud has a Latinum lining
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
234.  Never deal with beggars; it's bad for profits
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
235.  Don't trust anyone who trusts you
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
236.  You can't buy fate
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
237.  There's a sucker born every minute.  Be sure you're the first to find
each one
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
238.  The truth will cost
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
239.  Ambition knows no family
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
240.  The higher you bid, the more customers you drive away
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
241.  Never underestimate the inportance of the fist impression
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
242.  More is good, all is better
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
243.  If you got something nice to say, then SHOUT
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
244.  If you can't sell it, sit on it, but never give it away
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
245.  A warranty is valid only if they can find you
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
246.  He that speaks ill of the wares will buy them
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
247.  Never question luck
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
248.  Celebrate when you are paid, not, when you are promised
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
249.  Respect other culture's beliefs; they'll be more likely to give you money
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
250.  A dead vendor doesn't demand money
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
251.  Satisfaction is not guaranteed
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
252.  Let the buyer beware
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
253.  A contract without fine print is a fool's document
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
254.  Anyone who can't tell a fake doesn't deserve the real thing
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
255.  A warranty without loop-holes is a liability
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
256.  Synthehol is the lubricant of choice for a customer's stuck purse
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
257.  Only fools negotiate with their own money
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
258.  A Ferengi is only as important as the amount of Latinum he carries in his
pockets
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
259.  A lie is a way to tell the truth to someone who doesn't know
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
260.  Gambling is like the way to power: The only way to win is to cheat, but
don't get caught in the process
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
261.  A wealthy man can afford everything except a conscience
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
262.  No lobes, no profit
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
263.  Never let a female in clothes cloud your sense of profit
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
264.  It's not the size of your planet, but it's income, that matters
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
265.  The fear of loss may be your greatest enemy or your best friend - choose
wisely
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
266.  A pair of good ears will ring dry a hundred tongues
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
267.  Wish not so much to live Long, as to live well
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
268.  a) When in doubt, lie
      b) When in doubt, buy
      c) When in doubt, demand more money
      d) When in doubt, shoot them, take their money, run and blame someone
      else
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
269.  Never purchase anything that has been promised to be valuable or go up in
value
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
270.  It's better to have gambled and lost than to never have gambled at all
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
271.  There's many witty men whose brains can't line their pockets
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
272.  The way to a Ferengi's heart is through his wallet
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
273.  Always count their Latinum before selling anything
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
274.  There is no profit in love; however, a strong heart is worth a few bars
of Latinum on the open market. Keep it on ice
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
275.  Latinum can't buy happiness, but you can sure have a blast renting it
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
276.  If at first you don't succeed, try to acquire again
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
277.  Diamonds may be girl's best friend, but you can only buy the girl with
Latinum
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
278.  It's better to swallow your pride than to lose your profit
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
279.  Never close a deal too soon after a female strokes your lobes
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
280.  An empty bag can not stand upright
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
281.  Blood is thicker than water, but harder to sell
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
282.  Business is like war; it's important to recognize the winner
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
283.  Rules are always subject to change
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
284.  Rules are always subject to interpretation
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
285.  No good deed ever goes unpunished
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
286.  When Morn leaves it is all over
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
287.  Whenever you exploit someone, it never hurts to thank them. That way,
it's easier to exploit them the next time. (Neelix made this rule up)
%
Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition:
The Unwritten Rule: When no appropriate Rule applies, make one up!
%
Zek's Revised Ferengi Rules of Acquisition:
Rule 001 » If they want their money back, give it to them.
%
Zek's Revised Ferengi Rules of Acquisition:
Rule 010 » Greed is dead.
%
Zek's Revised Ferengi Rules of Acquisition:
Rule 021 » Never place profit before friendship.
%
Zek's Revised Ferengi Rules of Acquisition:
Rule 022 » Latinum tarnishes, but family is forever.
%
Zek's Revised Ferengi Rules of Acquisition:
Rule 023 » Money can never replace dignity.
%
Zek's Revised Ferengi Rules of Acquisition:
Rule 285 » A good deed is its own reward.
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